Every day as I leave work, I drive past a tiny tattoo parlor, where a few guys wearing wife-beaters and covered in ink are usually hanging out on the sidewalk, waiting for customers. And every day I think the same thing: I don’t understand tattoos. I recognize the fact that tats are as old as history itself, but I just can’t see any real reason for them in 21st-Century America.
Right off the bat, tattoos are insanely expensive, even the little ones. And removing them? From what I’ve been told the most painful thing you’ll ever experience. And, oh yeah, insanely expensive. For anyone who wants to get a tat, because it would be super-cool, I advise watching MTV’s episode of True Life that chronicles 3 young people who want to remove their body ink forever. It’s a brutally-honest hour of TV. But before we talk about removing tats, let’s talk about the stupid reasons why people get them. First, there’s no need for someone to get a Celtic Irish cross, Italian flag, or Puerto Rican colors stamped on their body because their genetic makeup happens to carry these particular nationalities in it. If you’re so proud of being part Irish, rather than maim your body why don’t you just visit the land of your quasi-origin? Guess what? You’ll come back happy that you’re American. What about the tat to remember a loved one lost? For anyone who has lost a loved one, I am deeply sorry for you, no doubt. But do you really need a bald eagle flying over a sunset painted down the middle of your back, and in small font the lifespan and name of said person? In what way is that an homage to that passed-away person? Why does your memorial need to be up in everyone’s face like that? Where’s the respect and discretion? And yeah, yeah, I know: people mourn in a million different ways. Spare me. I am not insulting it. I just don’t get it. The stupidest tattoo story I ever heard though had to do with a wedding party and matching tats. This joker, the groom, pressured everybody in his wedding party to get matching tats in order to always remember the BIG DAY. The truth: Nobody cares about your ridiculous wedding except you. Maim my body, the only body I’ll ever have, to remember this nonsense? No thanks.
Tribal bands around the bicep? As cliché as it gets. The full sleeve? Yuck. The sun-tattoo around the belly button. What a mistake. Those yellow-and-red tats that every biker-guy seems to have that don’t look like anything at all? Do I even need to add an adjective to this? How about tats on chicks? Nah. A butterfly on the ankle looks awful, a gigantic tattoo across the small of the back, even worse. You know, the Tramp Stamp? Any girl who has a Tramp Stamp is really as ridiculous as it gets. Hearing about ink in oh-so-secret places isn’t a turn on. Doesn’t make you any prettier. Sorry. Playboy bunny tats? Dumb, dumb, dumb. If you are 18 and thinking of getting a tat, because it would be cool, or because you think a dragon on your right leg would be cool, because you possess the spirit of the dragon, I beg you, plead with you to reconsider. At least talk to someone who is older and has a tat. Bet they try to talk you out of it. If I kept half of what I thought was cool when I was 18, I would probably be rotting away in an asylum or riding with the circus. Tattoos, I promise, will be a lifetime reminder of some stupid moment in your past that you can’t erase.
In society tats are seen as distasteful. Try getting a corporate job with a ten-inch tat of the Road Runner on your right forearm or your name in old English on the back of your neck. Never happen unless you keep them hidden. Our society is one based on prejudice and first impressions. Sorry, it’s the truth, whether you want to admit it or not. So unless you want to be viewed as a thug or some common criminal, don’t cover your body with bright ink-designs. These tats could do more to shape your future than any college degree you might have. And I promise 9 out of 10 times that shaping will be towards the negative. Now, I know there are many role models covered in full-body tats. Great guys like Jesse James (that’s the guy who cheated on that idiot Sandra Bullock), Dennis Rodman, Mike Tyson, and Tom Arnold, to name a few. Great guys. Am I being sarcastic? I am. Am I stereotyping? Of course. That’s what Americans do.
So I say if you want to practice self-expression, get a wild haircut and some crazy clothes. If you insist on everyone knowing about every aspect of your personal life, dump the design for the cobra-snake tattoo across your shoulder blades and update your Facebook page more often. You get one body in this life. No need to ruin it with a Kurt Cobain face on your chest.
Brian Huba
6/2/10
Well then obviously you are a person that has none....we get it you dont like them!! You probably have your own thing you do that ppl may not understand! Your right tattoos are as old as we are but that is just a way of exspressing ourselves...it doesnt hurt you so why so uptight about it?? Thats part of life...everyone does there own thing and thats that....no point in questioning it!!
ReplyDeleteI am lacking understanding for people who smoke cigarettes, and for people who judge others for how they look. I am a 50 year old woman with four tattoos and I do not regret one of them. I am a teacher and one of my tats is visible. I have never been asked to cover it up for my job. My point is there are things that each of us may not understand but lets not assume that just because someone has a tattoo they should be judged by some half-assed standard,
ReplyDeleteMost tattoo folks smoke. Don't believe me? Look at the smokers outside any store and they are inked. Like cigarettes, people that get tattoos are generally follow the crowd, insecure people
DeleteWhy are you always so angry and sour? I'd never let you teach my kids. Judging from your angry and childish rants, you were one of those people who had their underwear pulled over their head and then were stuffed into a locker...and that happened at least daily to you.
ReplyDeleteMy first impression of YOU is that you have a poor attitude about diversity and self-expression. How many people do you know who have tattoos they regret or have gotten them removed? Obviously, you're hanging out with folks who make poor decisions in the first place if they've gotten that far. I have several tattoes, and I wait about a year after I decide what image or phrase I'd like to ensure I will appreciate it down the line. I have several VISIBLE tattos, and I was hired out of college. The "corporate" folks I work with think they are interesting and tasteful, and you'd be surprised who shows me their hidden tattoo with a smirk and tells me their unique story behind the ink.
ReplyDeleteIt's 2010 - get a grip.
WOW...This guy may be the biggest idiot of them all. You picked 3 names of people who have tattoos that may not be role models. But wait a minute, lets not forget that Jesse James grew up with nothing and now has one of the best and most respectable custom motorcycle shops in the world. I dont think i would mind my kid looking up to him. i can name so many people with tattoos that are role models it isnt funny. To name one, how about the fireman that i just saw with a full sleeve. I'm pretty sure that he is a role model.
ReplyDeleteBasically what I am saying is that you are a kid that made fun of a lot as a kid, probably still do on a regular basis. You should never tell any kid what they should or shouldn't do, especially as a teacher. You dont have to like tattoos, but they cant hurt you, and everyone is entitled to their own opinion which also includes the students you teach.
Before you go writing another blog about a topic you know nothing about, do a little more research. Getting them removed is painful, but nowhere near as painful as many other things. Getting the tattoo is painful. Its suppossed to be. It will be a part of your body for the rest of your life. I will not regret anything i have tattooed on my body, and i have plenty of them.
You do not mind your kid looking up to Jesse James? lol. That is priceless. You probably would not mind your kid looking up to the other Jesse James as well; You know the train robber. By the way , that is all well and good that the fireman has a full sleeve. I bet you did not know that many municipalities do not hire people with visible tattoos for all kinds of jobs, including fireman.
DeleteI am Agreeing with everyone else who has posted a comment here. For being a teacher you sure do lack a sense of diversity, and knowledge behind tattoos. Most people do not get tattoos beause they are cool, we get them because there is a signifigance behind them, whether it be emotional, a sense of pride etc.. For example I am sure you have a pocket protector to show off your cool red pens you use for grading papers.. Point being just because you dislike tattoos, and don't understand the reasoning behind them, doesn't mean that the rest of society that does enjoy them have to deal with inconsiderate people like you.
ReplyDeleteThe significance is that you are a follower brainwashed by Hollywood and most of you smoke, another peer pressure activity. I am onto the sheep mentality of people that scare their body with those disgusting things.
DeleteThe other thing I enjoy is how he is defending the under 18 year old punks that sit in the mall and cause trouble in his article about crosgates mall, then comes back and writes this baloney about people with tattoos. He will sit there and defend these kids, and say they are being profiled by mall security, yet he himself is profiling people with tattoos. Make up your mind pal..
ReplyDeleteIt's really sad that someone as narrow minded as you are is a school teacher. I'm glad my children are now adults.
ReplyDeleteSuggestions: 1. Don't get tattooed and 2. find something better to do with your free time.
I hate to say it, but I agree with parts of this blog. A few tattoos arent bad, especially ones you can hide, But people who have tattoos all over?? Spare me. It looks dumb and trashy. Sorry, and ok, maybe I am being judgemental, but I have a right to an opinon too. (-:
ReplyDeletemost people i know get tatts under peer pressure, like a dare & most DO regret it later. some don't but most do regret it even if takes 10-15 years. i know one guy who got a giant sleeve tatt to cover a few regretted smaller ones. now he regrets the whole sleeve. ahhhh hahaha. they're ok as long as you're not an insecure idiot. it is truly like wearing your emotions on your sleeve i guess. i don't judge peeps for them but its takes away all my guess work out figuring anothers emotional state of mind. plus i can't wait for the trend of tattoos to wear off. and it will. permanent ex-fashion! have to wait for the next tattoo trend to reappear. LOLz
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry - I have to agree with the OP.
ReplyDeleteI also have to agree with the blogger. I am not going to judge anyone who has them, but it's one fad/trend I just don't understand. It doesn't look good to me. I guess I'm just kinda old-fashioned...treat the body like a temple, etc, etc. I like and appreciate art, but would rather buy a painting and not make my body one. Hoping this trend, like many others, will fade away one day...
ReplyDeleteI don't disagree with tattoos at all but they're getting popular enough with today's youth that they're bordering on FAD. It's as though some people want a tattoo "just to have a tattoo" or "express themself" but I just find that silly. You can ink a spiritualistic mantra on your back but that doesn't mean you believe it any more than the next person. If you really believe in something or want to express yourself, I'll be able to identify that whether you have a tattoo or not.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. The act of having ink permanently deposited under the epidermis as a form of self expression eludes me. I prefer natural skin to even the most exquisite tattoo.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. Tats are for attention whores. And, frankly I find it incredibly sad that people do things to their body that they wouldn't even consider doing to something like their car.
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ReplyDeleteI try hard not to be closed-minded and not to put anyone down for getting tats. I just agree that I have never understood them. I understand that they are an art form and I respect that but there are other ways to be creative. Putting something permanent on your body; I just can't quite understand personally. I had I dream once that I got tattoos on my wrists and woke up all panicky that I had been destructive to my own body. It was a odd dream, needless to say. I remember learning in my Psychology class that statistically speaking like 80% (can't remember the exact number but I do remember it was very high, like 80 to 90%) of women who get tattoos have been molested or raped. In psychology this is analyzed to mean that tats are a way for the person to feel they are back in control of their of body (in our culture that is). I thought this was interesting.
ReplyDeleteSpare the prejudice crap. Like it or not people judge you all the time. If you dress a certain way, like pants on the ground, you are going to be judged as well. It is called life. Pants on the ground or a mohawk or torn t shirt are relatively easy to correct. Tattoos are so permanent. I will continue to say it is insecure people being brainwashed... Especially since it is usually the same people that smoke. Telling me they want to fit into whatever crowd and tattoos are a part of that crowd. I dare say if Angelina Jolie jumped off a roof, many of these same people would as well. Great points OP.
ReplyDeleteMORNGLORY .... The body art line they use is just that a line. Do you seriously think that a significant percentage of tattoo people, have ever even been an art museum, let alone an art gallery???? lmao
ReplyDeleteI was following you because I don't get tats either. I was with even when you recommended traveling to the country of one's ancestry--that seems like a much better investment to me.
ReplyDeleteThen you get all jingoistic--I thought the reason for travel was to learn, not to be glad you're American.
Sheez.