Tuesday, February 28, 2012
10 Most Annoying Celebrities
For some reason watching the 84th Oscars on Sunday night got me thinking about how annoying so many celebrities are. So, for what it’s worth, here’s my list of the 10 Most Annoying Celebrities in Showbiz today. I'll leave off Angelina Jolie and the JERSEY SHORE cast.
10. Justin Bieber: I actually started out as a fan of the Beebs. I mean, not an actual fan, I’m a grown man, but I thought a few of his songs were OK, and I tried to understand the mania. But what does the Beebs do? He hasn’t made an album in like three years. How many times can he perform “U Smile”? He just kind of shows up on award shows and celebrity events with that increasingly-annoying hairdo, and is sort of becoming famous for being famous, which is a shame, because I thought he could’ve been a pretty good song and dance guy. Maybe it's not too late, but 18 is pretty old.
9. Tim Tebow: As someone who loves the NFL, this celebrity is highly annoying to me because he completely stinks at QB. What do I mean by that? I mean he’s not a good player at all. I know he always says and does the right thing, and talks about God a lot. But saying and doing the right thing ALL the time, and talking about God can get REALLY annoying. If you want to make Tebow Jeremy Lin for the purposes of timeliness, that’s OK with me. P.S. Can ppl stop Tebowing now?
8. Sandra Bullock: OK, I know she hasn’t been that annoying in a while. But I’m still super annoyed from that whole BLINDSIDE-breaking up with Jesse James period. Plus she’s a terrible actress who’s treated like she’s Meryl Streep because she got dumped by some biker guy. BLINDSIDE = the most overrated movie ever (except THE HELP of course).
7. Tony Bennett: Why do ppl think Tony Bennett is a good singer? If he shows up at an awards show or celebrity event, cue the three-minute standing ovation. Why? He’s a poor man’s Frank Sinatra, at best. He’s really boring, and really bad, and really old, but not try telling me he was great 30 years ago. He wasn't. Did anybody hear the duet he did with Amy Winehouse? Horrid.
6. Rihanna: Why does Rihanna attempt to ruin Chris Brown’s career by making a Federal Case over what happened after the Grammy's three years ago? (I'm not defending his behavior in any way, shape, or form.) Why does she decide to go on every talk show in America and publish pictures of her badly-beaten face? Then, in a stunning about-face, why does she do a song with Eminem that essentially glorifies violence against women? Then why does she get back together (basically) with Brown? I know why. Because she’s super annoying.
5. Betty White: Enough already with the Betty White love fest! She’s not funny. I don’t mind giving it to the old gal for staying relevant at 103 years old, I get that part. But does she really need to win Emmy’s and Screen Actors’ Awards for her work on HOT IN CLEVELAND? I actually like the show, and think it’s funny, until White does a scene, then grind on the brakes. Enough of the carrying on.
4. The Kardashians: They are Kollectively so Kosmically annoying that this almost feels like a wasted entry in my most annoying Kategory. I mean what Kan I say that hasn’t been said already? There is absolutely nothing to like about Kim, Kourtney, or Khloe, unless you like shallow, staged, and stupid. Who Kares, right? And of course, don’t forget Kris or Kris. What can I say? It’s total Krap.
3. J-Lo: Don’t be fooled by the plunging-neckline dress she wears to the Oscar’s, she’s still, she’s still Jenny Desperate For Attention. I can honestly say that everything about J-Lo annoys me, from the trumped-up Bronx accent to sound like she’s still from the block, to the way her teary-eyed, artificial, look-at-me presence has made IDOL virtually unwatchable, to the way she dumped Marc Anthony and cracked apart her family because she was relevant and famous again, and thus too big for Marc Anthony. I promise she is one of the most selfish women on the planet. Nope, not a fan of J-Lo.
2. P Diddy: Every LAST thing about P Diddy annoys me.
1. Chelsea Handler: The fact that Chelsea Handler is a celebrity is a joke, right? There is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING funny about Chelsea Handler. Her talk show on E! is the worst thing on TV. It’s so bad I don’t know if it’s a talk show or a talk show mocking a talk show. It’s awkward and amateurish. When making a joke about Magic Johnson she said, “I’d like to see his magic Johnson.” What is this the sixth-grade lunch table? I tried watching that sitcom she’s in, where she makes all those dumb one-liners about sex, endlessly, it’s beyond bad. Her movies are straight to DVD, Razzie worthy at every turn. (Reese Witherspoon what were you thinking?) Every interview she does makes me dislike her even more. When the brilliant Howard Stern can’t make me like a celebrity (He made me like the Situation for God's sake) I mean, forget it. The glorification of this loudmouth drunk who ISN’T funny just isn’t my cup of tea, I guess. We need the CH phase to end ASAP.