Thursday, April 15, 2010

Are There Any American Heroes Left?

I understand that famous people who’ve fallen out of the limelight are forever searching for that resurgence. But this is ridiculous. First for Buzz it was a short-lived stint on that train wreck of a show DANCING WITH THE STARS. Talk about a collection of the worst people in the world, from that grubby attention-hungry pig Erin Andrews to the most horrible human being on the face of the earth, Kate Gosselin, a woman who used her kids to get famous then abandoned her kids to get more famous. But hey, like her People Magazine spread asks: “Why can’t a mom have fun!?”

But this is the brand-new America, right? And 80-year-old, former astronaut Buzz Aldrin’s in the middle of it all. A few days after being eliminated from that ABC trashfest, Buzz stopped by the Howard Stern studio in NYC for a candid interview about all things, including his sexual conquests of yesteryear. Despite Howard’s best efforts to get Buzz to dish on his disgusting DANCING cast mates, the second man to walk on the moon was really there to promote his new app for the I-Phone. That’s right. An I-Phone app. It’s gone from making world history in front of 600 million viewers to shopping himself out for the I-phone. The man NASA once dubbed ‘Dr. Rendezvous’ has gone Madison Avenue on us, leaving all integrity and self respect somewhere in outer space. This is what our national icons look like now.

Are there any American heroes left?

This pathetic degeneration by Buzz Aldrin, the man who once shattered barriers by performing the first successful spacewalk in 1966, is just one of many examples of how this country has gone from a morals-based society, to a dog fight for instant and unearned fame. Across this country, politicians are constantly in trouble for lying, cheating, and just being plain stupid in every way, shape, and form. One need not look further then the Alaskan-idiot for that. For God’s sake the man who tried selling Obama’s Senate seat was put on a reality show. The world’s best golfer’s a serial cheater, the QB of the Pittsburgh Steelers does nothing but rape women and get away with it, and the best basketball player who ever lived, Michael Jordan, gives the whole world a massive, ego-driven screw you when being inducted into the NBA Hall of Fame. And that’s just the sports world. Don’t even get me started on the entertainment world, where Kim Kardashian, a woman whose talents are best displayed in a skimpy-fitting bikini, carries a bigger security detail than Tom Cruise. And we wonder why our young people think this world owes them everything.

If I’m a 12 year old in America who am I supposed to look up to? Justin Beiber? Compared to Kate Gosselin and this 21st-century Buzz Aldrin, itsy-bitsy JB is a National Treasure. When our kids are being taught about the first men to ever moonwalk in 1969, how Aldrin and Armstrong were instant heroes, I’m sure more than one plucky student will raise his/her hand and say, “Buzz Aldrin? You mean that old guy from DANCING WITH THE STARS?” Like Tony Soprano eternally wondered in therapy, “Whatever happened to guys like Gary Cooper? The strong, silent type?” Well, Tony, they got their own reality show, a Twitter following, and a sex scandal involving an Applebee’s waitress who pole-dances on the side. The only thing on TV is reality TV, but for the very few sitcoms that have survived, the sexual innuendo they say and show is so blatant, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone under 35.

I wonder what Martin Luther King and JFK would think of this brand-new America. I sure don’t know. But I’d bet it’d make one hell of a celebrity-house show on VH1. As for now, we have Buzz Aldrin on the I-Phone, Eric Clapton hustling for T-Mobile, and Sandra Bullock somehow winning Oscars for that silly Blindside, while her husband two times her with a breathing blow-up doll. What can I say? Talent and integrity have gone bye-bye.

Are there any American heroes left?

Brian Huba


  1. Brian
    Seriosuly, you are super smart and funny. And I think you really do care about Buzz and his image. But have you actually downloaded and seen the iPhone app. It is an amazing thing. It us exactly the kind of thing you WOULD WANT Buzz to be doing. He has tons of brilliant and normally inaccessible scientific and space minds all communicating in this app, he himself comemnts of every range of what space program is doing and the resources are encyclopedic. Right now there is a live tv stream from the space shuttle in orbit. It's really good. So maybe you could change the article a bit and remove "whoring himself out for the iPhone" and just say, the app is actually an example of what is good.

  2. Not smart. Not funny. Seems hooked on the pop culture he bashes. Yawn.

  3. I havent, and my friends sureas hell havent. The four other kids were all in their early teens, two boys,two girls.
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    I havent, and my friends sureas hell havent. The four other kids were all in their early teens, two boys,two girls.